Welcome to Mommyhood! Where the good, bad, and constant change awaits you. No need to fear this path, for it has a lot of brilliant lessons to offer you as well.
As a new mom, it may be hard to adjust to all the complex tasks that life throws at you. In the beginning, I was completely stunned by the to-do list that came with being a mother. The list is still growing everyday. Whether it’s a new technique I need to learn. A new milestone my child needs to meet. Or simply the battle over sleep routines and picky food choices. It’s exhausting.
All of these tasks create a new woman, to give life to a new mother. Our old selves still exist in some aspects. Yet, who we are becoming calls us closer to our higher selves each day. This is a person that we may have a tough time embracing. A woman who has to wear new clothes, go to different places, develop new mindsets and let old habits die. This is easier said than done.
We must make peace with the women we are becoming as mothers. Here are some tips to help you embrace your new role with peace:
Give Yourself Time to Adjust
Mommyhood requires a lot of immediate changes from you. Your diet may need to change if you are breastfeeding. Sleep patterns may need to be adjusted because you aren’t getting any. You may have to spend your weekends battling baby fevers, instead of out with the girls. The sooner you face the fact that your life has changed, the better your outcomes will be.
However, you don’t have to be a super mom right off the back. When I first became a mother, it was a bit overwhelming. I missed the days where the best feeling in the world was taking off my bra to let the “che-che’s” breath. Soon after giving birth, taking off my bra meant someone was hungry every 2 hours. By far the toughest adjustment yet. I had to give myself time to adjust to the pain, bonding, and sometimes, plain irritation of having someone of my chest all day.
Through breastfeeding, I learned that you must give yourself time as a mother. Yes, there are a ton of tasks that you need to do for yourself, your baby, and family. However, you should feel the need to only strive for perfection. You breastfeeding routine will get better overtime. Sleeping schedules will work out. The only thing that matters is that you are trying. That’s good enough. Give your best. Adjust as you go by tweaking things when you see necessary. Motherhood is a marathon, not a sprint.
Give yourself time to recover. Click here for tips!
Experiment with New Self-Care Routines
Before being a mother, self-care meant a lot of different things. Occasional glass of wine while watching your favorite tv show. Going on luxurious trips with your friends. Even staying at home may have been good enough for you. Honestly, you could do whatever you wanted when the baby was not a factor.
Although you may still be about to schedule activities you like, you might have to adjust your self-care routines a bit. That’s why you must experiment with new routines that fit your current lifestyle. You may not like binge-watching tv shows anymore. After all, you might be in the house with the baby watching tv all day. Try replacing your old self-care routines with more upbeat activities. Taking walks. Setting up playdates. Connecting with other moms to get some ideas.
If you’re like me, you may even find some of the activities that you do with your baby to be therapeutic. For instance, I find excuses to blow bubbles with my baby. It’s extremely satisfying. Sometimes, I secretly blow bubbles to relieve stress even when my daughter isn’t around. Bubbles might not be your thing, but you can add them to your list of things to try. As long as you find new ways to keep yourself energized, you will identify several peaceful outlets.
Need self-care tips? These are the best tips!
Connect with Other Mothers
Being a mom is such a unique journey. Yet, moms have plenty of similiarities on their journeys. The best way to make peace with your new self as a mom is to find other moms who you share commonalities with. Connecting with other moms can help you find peace with all sorts of issues that arise as a mother. Issues concerning learning disabilities, parenting skills, handicaps, discipline lessons, bedtime routines, bullying, breastfeeding and so much more. Mothers need support. Even if it to celebrate parties, graduations, and simply just to brag on your child. There is a community of mothers waiting to embrace you.
You can find these communities on social media platforms. You can join mommy groups on Facebook. You can connect with moms on Instagram. Also, using Pinterest could connect you to testimonials from other moms, which could also lead to communities you can join.
If you are interested in going out, set up playdates with other moms. Take mommy classes to meet new moms. You can even start a mommy community, if you can’t find the right fit for you. This way you can recruit other moms who identify with your struggles. There is great peace in connecting with moms who understand you and your journey.
Find Your Sexy Again
Mommyhood comes with changes and stereotypes that women credit for stripping them of their sexiness. Engorged breasts, extra pounds, cravings, everyday leggings, gender roles and messy hair days. Yet, your sexiness has not gone anywhere. You just have to unpack it again.
First, you need to identify the areas that you are uncomfortable with.
Do you hate your new pounds? Okay. Start building up a workout routine.
Are you sick of wearing leggings every day? This could mean that it’s time to take a shopping trip. You can call your best friends, and let them remind you of how cute you used to dress. Interested in changing your style to reflect the new you? Try getting fashion tips from other moms who have switched their styles.
Whatever it is that you got to do to unpack your sexy, do it. You are still beautiful, fun, spontaneous, and free. You just have to identify the areas that you want to change and tweak some things. Start slow. Soon, you’ll notice that you are looking and feeling sexy while being a great mom at the same time.
Don’t Reminisce on the Past. Embrace the New You
Although you may miss a lot about the old you, don’t live in the past. Living in the past can cause you great pain. Leading to stress, sadness, and denial of your new reality. Embrace the new you. The old you has given life to a new woman. Who you are today is a product of your hard work, dedication, and perseverance. Meaning, you are more than prepared to accept who you are becoming.
Focus on being present in the moment. This way you are always aware of your emotions when you need to take a break, or new interests you are drawn to. Your awareness will positively influence your parenting style as well.
Ways you can embrace the new you:
- Use positive daily affirmations.
- Allow yourself to make mistakes.
- Practice self-love
- Make plans.
- Start a new hobby.
- Learn something new.
- Speak about your life in the present tense.
- Be grateful.
Let Old Habits Die Hard
For many mothers, we were thrusted into our roles while still dealing with the habits of our old selves. Habits consisting of procrastination, poor diets, shouting, anger, not planning, and other counterproductive tasks. Meanwhile, as a mother, most of your old habits will not serve you.
Who you are becoming as a mom will require did strategies. This means that you won’t have time for procrastination, poor planning, or eating unhealthy. Nor will you be about to leash out with anger or neglect your responsibilities. You now have a child who is looking up to you for guidance. Use this as your motivation to change for the better. You will invite more peace into your life in the long run.
You’d be helping yourself relieve stress by being prepared and well-planned. You’ll save yourself the agony of disciplining your child away from bad habits that they likely learned from you. Ultimately, you will be developing into the best version of yourself. A mother who can keep her composure under pressure and handle everything that comes her way.
Conclusion
Your life as a new mom is going to require a new you. Although you may have trouble with embracing your new identity, you have to make peace with who you are becoming. Give yourself time to adjust to your new reality. Try out new self-care routines. Connect with other mothers who you can relate to. Get in touch with your sexy again. Don’t reminisce too hard about the past. You have a future to embrace. Let old habits die hard. Ultimately, make peace with whatever version of you that will make you a stronger woman and a superior mom.
