The Do’s and Don’ts of Recovery After Giving Birth

After I gave birth to my baby girl, my world was thrown off-balance. I wasn’t getting any sleep. My daughter was anti-safe-sleep, literally refusing to sleep on her back. My nipples were adjusting to unpleasurable gnawing and milk production. I couldn’t take a shower without hearing phantom cries. My clothes stayed pukey from my daughter’s acid reflux. And to top everything off, I was still carrying around the pounds that were supposed to disappear once she was out.

Nobody told me I was signing up for this. “Have a baby,” they said. “They’ll be cute,” they said.

Yeah, cute and irritating.

My mental, physical, and emotional recovery after having my daughter was a rollercoaster. Despite the unpredictability, somehow I developed into a great mother. Through trial and error, I became refreshed and fearless.

Here are some Do’s and Don’ts you should consider if you want to emerge refreshed and fearless after giving birth.

Do’s

Do You!

If it’s not helping your recovery, it’s hurting your recovery. Trying to adhere to the information that everyone is throwing at you about schedules and best practices can be tough. I’m sure you want to take all the best advice and give your child the world but chill. Don’t go crazy trying to incorporate everyone’s methods. Do what’s best for you and your baby.

What’s best for you and your baby is unique. You all may wake up at 10 am and take a nap at 2 pm. That’s ok. You may want to eat in peace at night when everyone is asleep. That’s ok also. The point is people may find faults with your practices, but if what you are doing is working for you and your baby, keep doing it. Do what’s best for you and know that you can adjust at any time you want.

Do Relax!

Breathe. Sure you have been wobbling around for months waiting for the baby to arrive. Fantasizing about getting back in the gym and achieving your pre-pregnancy weight. However, you need to relax. Your body, mind, and soul need to heal. I know you want to hit the ground running and jump straight into being supermom. But you must relax for you and your baby’s sake.

You don’t want to start back too soon. Starting back too soon could overwhelm you. There will be enough stress dealing with your newborn. Don’t rush to add more.

For the time being, kick your feet up and focus on what’s right in front of you. Leave the things you are rushing to get to for another day. Trust me, they’ll be waiting for you whenever you finish relaxing.

Do Say “No”.

Find the courage to say no because if you don’t everything will infringe on your recovery time. You might have invitations coming in, requests to see the baby your first week home, and work calling you sooner than expected. Despite the urges to engage, just say “no”.

Giving in to all the requests that are coming your way can take away from your healing process. Your goal should be to maximize the time you have to bond with your baby and recover. Accomplishing your goal will be impossible if you say “yes” to everything that comes up. Ignore the pressure and say “no” when necessary.

You may be wondering when is it necessary to say “no”. Well, whenever it’s convenient for you and your baby. Sometimes your urge to say “no” starts as a feeling. If you get the feeling that you don’t want to do something, that might be a time to say “no”. If you get that feeling that an engagement may interfere with your baby’s schedule, say “no”. Ultimately, what you say “no” to depends on your mood and routines. Just know that the word “no” is your friend.

Don’ts

Don’t Let the Baby Fool You.

During your recovery, the main person driving you crazy might be your baby. Crying whenever you hand them off to daddy. Whining when all their needs have been satisfied. Essentially putting on a show whenever you try to do anything besides catering to them. You might feel obligated to meet the baby’s every need. Well, not so fast.

Don’t let your baby trick you into believing that you are the only person that can fulfill their needs. Of course, they may feel most comfortable with you, but let them figure out how nurturing daddy and/or other relatives can be.

Take a minute to pause. See how it plays out when you let other people help you with the baby. Your baby knows the exact triggers to get you running to their rescue but hesitate sometimes. Teach the people that you trust how to console your baby. Also, let them make up techniques to create a special bond with the baby. Whatever you do, don’t let your baby trick you into answering their every cry.

Don’t Keep Going Without Sleep.

Babies are constantly adjusting their biological clocks, which may set yours off balance. You might start staying up late to get a few moments of silence. You may wake up early after a couple of hours of sleep to feed the baby. You might even stay up all night trying to create some structure out of the chaos. This is all a part of being a mommy. Nonetheless, find a way to get proper sleep.

This is where you might need to rely on someone else to help you. If you can get someone else to help you balance the load of late nights and little sleep, do it. It’ll be impossible to continue to give your best to your baby if you aren’t getting rest. A lack of rest could cause all kinds of emotions. Crying, laughing, screaming and even wanting to quit. Your baby needs you to be as rested as possible.

With rest, you can gain clarity and patience for how you will make it through the day. Your sleep may not be consistent but make sure you get as much as possible during the week.

Don’t Be Afraid to Have an Emotional Moment.

Your body experiences a huge transition after giving birth. If you are breastfeeding, your nipples may hurt and your breasts may be engorged. You might be recovering from a Caesarean Section. You may even realize that those stretch marks aren’t leaving after months of putting cocoa butter on them. Whatever you are experiencing might affect your emotions. If so, don’t be afraid to have an emotional moment.

Cry if you need to. Scream if you have to. Say a curse word or two. Just make sure you aren’t bottling those emotions up. Hiding your emotions can affect you, the baby, and everyone around you in a negative way.

There is strength in displaying emotions. Know that even the moms that seem perfect have emotional moments. It’s ok. Don’t be fooled by all the cuteness and positivity that surrounds babies. You are more likely to experience stress more than ever after giving birth. Just be sure to manage your emotions and be real about how you are feeling.

When it’s all said and done, do you. The list of do’s and don’ts after giving birth is endless. Just remember that your recovery phase is unique. Make sure you relax. Relaxation is vital to your recovery. While you are relaxing, be sure to use the word “no” whenever necessary. Even if you have to tell the baby “no”. Don’t let your baby fool you. Don’t keep missing out on sleep either. Try to get sleep whenever you can so you can control your emotions. However, don’t be afraid to display your emotions if you desire.

Can you name any more do’s and don’ts of recovery after giving birth?